About
I like to think of myself as a kind soul who puts genuine human connection above all else. Mental health is at the core of what I do, whether it’s my creative forms of expression, or my daily life and casual interactions.
Among the several many forms of art I enjoy, writing has to be one that has always been able to strike the right chord, which first led me to study English translation and interpreting, and later kick-started my career as a copywriter, who now not only enjoys writing for work, but also writing for fun and self-expression.
During the day, you might sometimes find me in the middle of a “creative madness”, which more or less describes my process of “regurgitating” ideas and thoughts on paper or any other piece of media available at the time.
I love to find myself in that beautiful moment of sudden inspiration kick-sparking the not-so-young-anymore grinds in my brain. I imagine it as a very vivid ignition of neon colors across my neurons.
My viewpoints on life are usually reflected in my style of writing - honest and raw, but professional at the times that the situation calls for it.
Among other things, I enjoy breaking the fourth wall, dancing (particularly Vogue), creating out-of-the-box content, contemplating the vastness of the universe, and speaking out on LGBTI+ matters as a proud member of the community.
In the recent years of my life, I have come to understand that I resonate with the philosophy of absurdism, hence my belief that life does not need to have a meaning for us to enjoy it.
There are generally two pieces of wisdom I have acquired in my humble thirty years of existence:
When it comes to work, I stand by the principle that “limitation breeds creativity”.
When it comes to life, I believe that true happiness can be found in peace of mind, clarity, and confidence in knowing your strengths. If you keep looking for it without, just try to look within.
My Poetry
Fabrics of meaning
Welcome, so you have arrived
Welcome, have a lovely time
Congrats to those big brown eyes
They will spark a million smiles
You might wonder, so much light
Suddenly, it’s not so tight
You let out your first anxious cry
Where is safety, who am I
You don’t know your mom almost died
You won’t feel her warmth tonight
Just a helpless baby in an unknown crib
When you tire of crying, you fall asleep
You won’t remember these hard times
Nobody told you you should try
But that fear will linger still
For many dark and hopeless nights
We’re people obliged to live our lives
Get knocked down, yet look up to the skies
Be reminded how time flies
Get most of it before one dies
Often but a mere disguise
To live harder, faster, chase the highs
Often you learn too late
Of the secrets of a peaceful mind
I’ve tried sorrows and I’ve tried pleasures
I’ve tried many drastic measures
Instant gratifications
Gluttony, and all life’s treasures
And what I found is just a touch
Touch of friendship, love, might not seem much
Went above and beyond and such
Fucked up once and twice and countless bunch
What I want to say do I know not
Millon times finding the right spot
Never enough and never will
Never malicious though and never ill
Countless ponders, looking for meaning
Countless times close, intense breathing
Countless times wrong, looks be deceiving
Never once stopped, hopeless believing
Trusted fate to guide my ways
And ancestors to guide my days
And higher forces up above
Found comfort in every wrong place
Love misplaced elsewhere always
Mending hearts just passing by
And mending one’s own takes all it takes
When mending mind fails, goes awry
In others finding meaning mine
The penalty it took was time
Thirty years now gone behind
The first genuine breath, I’m fine
I don’t remember my first breath
No one does, not till their death
Life flashing or so it’ll go
We’re all hoping it’ll still be long
One day we will all be gone
Life but a blink in the universe
Significance will lose it’s urge
Come thousand years from now diverge
Yet we were here once strong and pretty
Our kindness brave and brains all witty
Often complaining our lives were shitty
Absurd and plane, cruel, and unkind
One thing that often comes to mind
In all of the absurd, all sense behind
One might eventually just find
That meaning is not subject to bind
Often do we play with the fabrics of meaning
All tangled and mount up to the ceiling
Goes above our heads and further
To the distance of oceans and seas
Beyond the mountains and the heavens
Beyond the stars and galaxies
Beyond the wonder of childhood dreams
And souls eternally light as feathers
Beyond beginning and beyond an end
Beyond feeling and beyond fact
We’re universes born correct
Craving the knowledge of cause and effect
Craving approval in one’s self
Craving luck and happiness
Craving bliss and good charm spell
Forever running from emptiness
And so we consume and eat and stuff
And we fill holes when life gets rough
We drill deep into our frozen thoughts
And often defend our rotten fronts
Often lash out in disagreement
Often get nothing but bereavement
Often confronted with our demons
Learning to love them lovely heathens
Searching for comfort that seems in vain
Searching for ways to avoid disdain
Searching for magic and flickering fire
We’re thrilled, excited, then sad, and tired
We’re buds of roses sprouting into life
We’re someone’s son, mother, nephew, or wife
We’re so many things to so many people
Humbled in feelings and traumas equal
We’re living, we’re dying, we’re doing our besT
In spurs of moments at no one’s behest
Alive or dead, making our marks
Foverer in cosmos chasing sparks
Sparks lighting in the hope of ignition
Hearts parting in the hope of vision
Breaking, mending in tiny incisions
Always making sure of our bad decisions
Welcome to those who have just arrived
Congrats, you’ve made it just in time
To watch the world as it slowly dies
One day you’ll know you will be fine
One day you’ll understand what it was about
One day, you’ll know, no shadow, no doubt
One day breathing in your moments last
You will find yourself reflecting on your past
One day you’ll find out that meaning
Has essentially been just living
Sensationally, love that’s giving
And eventually, peace in being
Cause one day, it might be too late
To repay for all anger and hate
One day, come the hand of fate
Time will stand still, you’ll feel its weight
And all of you will converge and crumble
With one last look inside searching for humble
Welcome friend, they call this life
In the absence of meaning you’ll know love
Peace
Peace
Nothing about that that’s fierce
Having collected every piece
Of your soul
And even if not, will you ever know?
Will this matter anyhow after all?
Will the sun lose its shiny glow
Will I ever be less whole
Than I am now
In this moment
Here
Letting the world just disappear
Into everything that I hold dear
And ever did and ever will
In this moment I’m standing still
Like a human bare of his meat
Like a naked essence stripped of the flesh and bones
And tiny little pretend thrones
And blows and scores and empty dose
Of wisdom that we pass onto each other
In this whiff of wind and running water
Of life and perfect fantasies
Not letting go and chasing dreams
And losing all the precious time
On what shall be and shall be mine
The penalty for an ugly crime
Of discovering that holy shrine
Upon which dwells your entire self
For these and those you put on a shelf
A different piece of yourself at will
Not to brag and not to do any ill
So that those standing there stand there still
Chasing that ever so wicked thrill
Of being perfect
Of being the one that they need
Being somewhere at full speed
And never stop, never drop, never flinge
While they run amok unhinged
When they shower you with their conditional love
Conditional friendship, conditional life
Condition upon condition
And sense of self beyond recognition
And bleeding heart gets overlooked
Just stay steady and lean on that hook
And they pull and pull and pull and pull
You inside their web of justifications
And objections and rejections and injections
Of their own insecurity
As if stripped of all the ability
For compassion
And fear of being left behind takes the rule
And blame of the world of pretense being cruel
And running out of fuel
They realize they are losing their grip on you
Your truth, as it becomes whole
Or maybe not, never be sure
And you question your own sanity
But in questioning comes sanctity
In discovering dwells serenity
Yet they still hold on to that pull
Alignment
We all shall seek
With bleak and freaky world around
Until their voices lose all sound
And you see them for what they are
You yourself are at the start
Crafting self is a work of art
But oft times it’s high time to part
They know they have played their part
And love will never fade from the memories of when they were your rock
But you’re not who you used to be
And they’re angry that you are not
The beauty of pain
The beauty of pain is in serenity
When nothing else remains, but to let go
The glorious giving up all control
When the fire burns and engulfs all
The beauty of pain is in relief
When closing a chapter of a tortured soul
Finding closure at times of no solution
Without finding solution at all
The beauty of pain is in no need for retribution
When you know what you know
When ending seems a proper conclusion
In falling to your feet you move on
The beauty of pain is in acknowledgement
Of the sad, and unfair, unjust and cruel
The beauty of allowing yourself to feel
And compassion with self the fires fuel
The beauty of pain is in being real
In all anger and agony and expression
The beauty of pain, pleasant ordeal
When all scars on your lonely heart are allowed to heal